So, how can we find hope in the midst of despair?
In order to come close to finding hope in the midst of despair, we must first take care of ourselves. Self-care isn’t just about massages and spa days, it’s about taking care of your physical and mental state so that you are your best self for you, your family, friends, and community.
Have you ever considered what you’re like as your best self? What are the key identifiers you are at your best?
Things to consider:
How do you feel when you wake up?
Are you able to determine what you’re grateful for?
How do you consider yourself?
Are you experiencing interactions that make you smile?
Are you regularly exercising?
Are you well hydrated?
These are merely suggestions for what might be indicators of you doing your best. It is important to recognize when you’re at you’re your best. Lest you not be able to identify when you need to take better care of yourself and how you can also nourish and support yourself.
To help find your way back to your best self, here are a few ways to intentionally care for and nourish yourself at no cost:
Pick up a pen or pencil and try journaling your thoughts. Can’t think of what to say? Try finding a journal with prompts or affirmations to help spark a thought or feeling you can write about.
Ground yourself in physical sensations like a cold shower or hot bath. Move your body with a walk, yoga, a jog, biking, or any kind of movement that brings you back to your body and not your wandering thoughts.
Meditate, even if for just a few minutes. Find just a few minutes of quiet, shut your eyes, and focus on what you’re feeling in your body. It’s a great way to quiet the thoughts, even if just for a moment. It’s a practice that teaches us we can calm ourselves and that we have control over our thoughts.
Drink plenty of water and get rest. It may feel like there is no time right now for rest, but remember rest is just as important as work. Life is all about balance. Rest is essential for growth and change.
One way to do this, is where applicable, to USE YOUR PTO and take care of you.
Honor your boundaries in your personal and professional relationships.
Another way to take care of yourself is to lean into your creativity. Find creative outlets to express yourself and find direction back to understanding who you are at the core. Learn more here.
During times of despair, we can often feel alone. Like you are the only one going through this. Or these deep feelings keep you from getting out into the world. If you feel alone or isolated, here a few things you can do:
Organize a group chat with trusted people in your circle. This can be on social media, via text, or in person. Either way, find a way to regularly connect with those in your circle you trust.
If you work from home, try working at a coffee shop with a calming or energetic vibe (whatever it is you need).
Research local organizing efforts and see how you can get involved. Think of something that speaks to you, something you feel passionate about.
Join an online community that is already established if creating one of your own feels like too much. Here are a few we like and often refer to during hard times:
Balanced Black Girl Podcast - Self-Care Hacks That Will Upgrade Your Life
The Soulful Mentions community on Substack
The feeling of overwhelm can also find its way into our psyche during times of despair. So, finding hope in the midst of despair is also about how to regulate your nervous system if you are feeling overwhelmed. The weight of all you THINK you need to do becomes too much to bear.
So, if you feel overwhelmed, try these helpful tips:
Put your phone away, even if just for an hour. We also suggest if you’re going to put your phone away, be intentional about it and approach it as self-care. When you go back to your phone, pay attention to how you felt when you were not using the phone vs. using the phone. And make changes accordingly.
Stop and move for 10 - 15 minutes. Go for a short walk, do jumping jacks, something to get the body moving and bring you back to the present moment.
Try a breathing exercise. The box breathing method is effective in calming your heart rate and grounding you in the present moment. Breathe in for 4, hold for 4, out for 4, and then hold for 4. Repeat.
Hopefully, a few of these tips will help you find hope in the midst of despair. And remember, “the only constant is change,” so the feeling of despair will not last forever.
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